I miss you.

It's been almost two months since I left Australia and I feel as if I am stuck in time. I am no longer in Australia but I am not back at school yet which is causing me to feel lost and alone. I don't have my support system of almost 100 Australian people that I knew in Warnie and I am not back in my old groove with my long time friends at Iowa State.

Sometimes when I'm bored, I find myself reading through my blog or looking through my pictures on my phone from Australia and I feel a sinking feeling in my stomach. You know when you're in a public place and someone says "I have something to tell you" and you feel like your stomach has disappeared and all of your organs are sloshing around and your skin is tingling? That's how I feel when I look through the pictures and realise that it has all happened already and all of my friends are 9576.2 miles/15411.4 km (yes, I googled it) away and there's a 14 hour time difference.

I wake up to their crazy, drunken, night out Snapchats and go to sleep when they are rolling out of bed hungover to go to class. Basically I just want to say that I miss you all so much. I wish I was back there, living with all my old housemates and everything was back to how it was. I know now that if, no, when I come back to visit, nothing will be the same as it was in those four months I was there and that's what scares me the most.

I miss you all more than words can do justice and there are too many of you to tell you individually, so this is to all you crazy Aussies on res, off res, my fellow exchange students, I miss you.

And just like that, it was over.

Made the mistake of listening to this while writing this post: Listen while reading

How did I get here?

I'm 21 years old. Every college kid's dream age.

Why was this the day that I had come to dread?

I was about to return to everything that I had ever know, while at the same time leaving everything that I had grown to love. 

The day began at 6:00 am on June 23rd. Sarah, Jacinta, and I woke up and gathered all of our crap together (mostly my crap). I ate a little more chocolate cake for breakfast than needed but, hey, it was my birthday. Finally, at 6:30 we headed off to the bus stop. I should mention that, by this point in my trip, my largest piece of luggage had only one wheel and weighed around 53 lbs. Manoeuvring it to the bus stop while the bottom of it was creating sparks on the sidewalk was a difficult feat.

We finally arrived at the bus stop. Three girls, two suitcases, and a large backpack. The bus ride to the airport was around four hours long. I was expecting to sleep for most of it, but we just ended up talking and recounting the last four months.

And then we arrived. I made my way to the check-in counter where I found out that my check-on bag was a little over-weight. It had to have been my lucky day because the guy working allowed me to check it on anyways because he saw on my passport that it was my birthday. Thank you guy who was at the United desk but didn't work for United. You made one girl very relieved.

Then it was time.

The time that I had pretended wasn't going to happen.

Goodbyes.

I found it quite funny how the hallway to the international area of the airport was paved with red carpet. It seemed almost exclusive, in a daunting way.

There, in front of that elegant red carpet, I hugged my two best friends for the last time. We exchanged notes and quite a few tears. As I walked down the carpet and turned back to see them for the last time, it felt as though something inside of me broke. A piece of my heart fell from the hole in my pocket and will remain with them forever.

Fourteen hours. One movie (The Awkward Moment), three meals, four Diet Cokes, six episodes of Sex and the City, and 45 minutes of sleeping later, I was in Los Angeles.

I must mention that I departed Australia at 11:20 am on June 23rd and arrived in LA at 10:20 am on June 23rd. Back to the future, right Sarah?

I had a five hour layover, so my fabulous cousin, Kelci, came and picked me up in her convertible and drove me around LA. I couldn't have asked for a better 21st birthday than the one that I had. I got to see the Hollywood sign (which you can see from her apartment balcony!). And that was the least of the exciting moments.

We picked up her friend Chelsea and headed to "brunch." Although our brunch consisted of peach bellinis. Which also doubled as the first legal alcoholic drink that I had ever drank in America. 

After drinks, we went to a little gem of a massage parlour and all three of us got massages. After a 14 hour flight, a full body massage felt like pure ecstasy. 

Thank you, Kelc, for giving me such an amazing 21st birthday. <3

We then went to pick up her dog, Tinkerbell, and we were off to the airport. Once there, we ran into a major bump in the road. Kelci wasn't going to be able to get on the flight with me because somehow we were "late." She was able to get on the following flight, so I had to make it through security quickly to make it to my own flight. To my annoyance, I got stopped before the security line because my carry-on was "too wide." So very quickly, I had to open it and remove my tennis shoes to wear through security. By this time, I was getting very flustered when I had to put all of my things through the security check. Only to find out that they would have to run my backpack through again because I forgot to remove my laptop. While waiting for it to scan, I heard the last call for my flight to Chicago. Finally, once everything was through, I took off towards my terminal at a fast walk. Over the intercom I heard, "Alixandra Badly-Pronounced-Last-Name" please make your way to the departure gate." 

And that's when I realised I was that girl. 

The one who would have to run down the terminal. 

And off I went.

Sweating, I took my seat on the plane and proceeded to pass out for the entire four hours to Chicago.

The plane landed.

I was in Chicago. 

When I left this plane I would see my parents.

I saw my dad first. He was wandering around.

And then, I saw my mom come in through the doors.

That I was happy to see them was an understatement.

We got my bags and waited for Kelci's flight to get in. We arrived at my Aunt and Uncle's house at around 2:30 am. At this time, everybody was asleep and I was in dire need of a shower. Before that though, my mom said that she had a surprise for me. She handed me a package that had Jacinta's name on it, but my address. I opened it and found a beautiful Australia necklace that I haven't taken off since (well except when I shower of course). Thank you Sarah and Cinta. <3

The next morning I woke up and my mom said she had one last surprise for me and she went upstairs. I heard a door open, then a tiny voice asking, "Is she here? She's back from Australia?" And I knew it was my three little peanuts. I thought they would have gone home by that time but there they were, ready for me to hug too hard and spoil with their gifts from Australia.

Then we; Mom, Dad, Eric, Kelci, Tink, and I left on our five hour drive home. I told myself to stay awake the whole day so that I could sleep that night, and I succeeded...until I got home and slept for a solid four hour nap.

The next morning I woke up, wide awake, at 4:00 am, so I watched the sunrise. The jetlag got periodically better. The next day I woke at 5:00 am, and the next at 6:00 am. 

I have to say that I didn't mind being up with the sunrise.

The Last Full Day

And there I was, atop Mount Dandenong on my last full day in Australia. Four and a half months had lead up to this. This moment, looking out from the top of this mountain with my best friend and her mum, afraid to leave. Afraid to have to return to reality, return to the real world. More afraid to leave than I was to arrive. This was unexpected.

I believe that the mountains are a hidden beauty amongst the tourist spots of Melbourne. Walking among so much greenery, breathing in the pure oxygen, I couldn't think of anywhere else I would have wanted to spend my last day. 

Up in the mountains lies an artist's dream known as the Rickett Sanctuary. A man by the name of William Rickett had a great love for Australia and its natural land. Most people believed him to be nuts, but to be any type of artist, you must be crazy to succeed. WIlliam lived up in the mountain where he carved sculptures into the natural stone of the mountain. He had a strong idealisation of Aboriginal people and they were the subject of a majority of his work. 

His sculptures have been preserved and the land on which they reside has been declared a nature sanctuary by Parks Victoria. 

vvv  Sarah enjoys snapping too many photos when asked for only one...

Although it held a jungle vibe, in my opinion, the walk-through made me feel as if I was underwater. The sculptures and all of the green gave me a sense of a deep ocean mermaid paradise.

After we finished the walkthrough of Rickett Sanctuary, we ventured on to the quaint town of Sassafras. 

A.K.A. The sole town a person with a lisp would not wish to live in.

Sassafras was very old-timey, elaborate dollhouses on display, a self-roast marshmallow "cauldron," and the most terrifying shop by the name of Gepetto;s.

We stumbled upon these kids while meandering the shops and I had to stop and listen. As I said before, about the dancers at the Perth street art festival, something about impromptu artistry by young people makes me uncontrollably happy. 

We eventually found ourselves in the lollie shop...surprise surprise. Some of the lollies were very interesting. Soon after exploring the lollie shop, Sarah and I got caught up in a tiny foodie shop with tons of free samples. To say we took advantage of these samples would be an understatement.

As it was my 21st birthday the following day, Sarah and I took it upon ourselves to bake a chocolate cake. You must take advantage of every opportunity you can get to devour a chocolate cake (unless it's from Mrs. Trunchbull *hahaha Matilda joke).

Jacinta came that night as well and we all ate a delicious, home-cooked roast (I cut the veggies!) and ate the cake with ice cream and strawberries. They surprised me by singing me happy birthday and lighting candles on the cake. I hadn't blown out candles in what seems like forever (but is realistically only about 4 years). I tried my hardest, and succeeded, in holding back tears. 

Sarah's mum and dad are amazing and I would just like to thank them so much for making me feel so welcome while I was there. I couldn't have asked for better people to stay with. A huge thank you to Sarah's mum for chauffeuring us around and tolerating our shenanigans. I couldn't be more grateful to know that I have family across the world as well. <3